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Monday, April 20, 2009 4:54 PM

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I'm currently at KL blogging !! tee hee.
The story as promised =)

My Lover My Soul

The rain is so heavy, i could barely see anything infront of me so i kept to the minimal speed. I suddenly saw a fast approaching car coming from the opposite road i tried dodging but it was too late. Everything happened so fast, before i knew i crashed. With my blurred vision i saw blood on my windscreen and i could feel the pressure on my legs. All that was on my mind was flashbacks of memories with him..

Tears fall down my eyes when i think that i might be leaving him forever.. I tried my best to grab hold of my phone located in my pocket.

Instead of typing what i wanted to, i did this instead.

"Baby it has been great being with you all this while, thanks for everything but i don't love you anymore. I'm sorry! Find yourself a better girl, you deserve someone way better than me. Pls don't call or look for me anymore, let this be the last message between the both of us."
Layla~

Tears flood my eyes when i pushed the send button, underneath my breathe i repeatedly say "i'm sorry Greg i really loved you but i can't be selfish"

I could no longer keep myself awake and i passed out.

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When i opened my eyes, i saw my parents. I was really glad that i'm still alive at that moment.
My mum ran over and hugged me. I had been in coma for a week because i lost too much blood and my head knocked the steering. When i tried to sit up, i can't feel my legs. I tried harder, but my legs just wouldn't move. I look at my parents in horror and asked them what happened to my legs. They didn't answer me instead they assured me that it was a temporary effect, but from their expressions i felt suspicious. I called for the doctor, although they stopped me repeatedly but i didn't listen. The doctor came for a checkup 20 minutes later ; he told me i wouldnt be able to move my legs anymore, they tried their best to recover my nerves but i was sent into the hospital too late. In other words, i will never be able to walk again. At that moment, my brains really couldn't register anything he said anymore because the words "you won't be able to walk anymore" struck me so hard and it just rung on my brains over and over again.

xxxxx

I started cursing the person that drove so fast to overtake the car infront of him. I blamed him for everything. But what is the use now? it is as if i could walk again. My parents told me that the young man that crashed into my car had passed away on the spot and his car was out of control at that point. His parents apologized on his behalf when i was in coma.

xxxxxx

The door of my ward crept open. The last person i would ever expect to visit me stood right infront of my eyes ; Greg. He greeted my parents and he brought a bouquet of my favourite flowers with him. He turned to me and gave me his sweetest smile. "Layla ! i'm so glad you're awake already i just got a called from the hospital just now ! i rushed here" greg yelled in excitement. He came over to hug me but i pushed him away. I treated him coldly.
I loved him alot, but i really couldnt let him see me like this especially knowing that i won't be able to walk forever. I don't want to be his burden. I don't want him to take care of me for my whole life. I don't want to be selfish because i'd rather walk the rest of my life like this ; alone.
Instead of giving up, he continued treating me nicely. He speaks to me gently even when i don't reply him.

After awhile i couldnt stand it any longer so i asked him if he'd received my message the day i had an accident. And he said "yup i sure did" with a huge smile on his face, he even said thank you.

I yelled at him "are you crazy?! do you not understand english? i told you i don't love you anymore! leave me alone!! i hate you, go away ! stop bugging me Greg. I don't LOVE YOU! understand?"

I tried so hard to control my tears, to not show him i still love him. Those words that came out from my mouth hurt myself even more than it hurt him. It felt as if i am tearing my own heart into pieces.

xxxxxxxxxx

He just sat down and look me in the eyes, he held my hands and said, "Layla, at that moment i saw your message i thought you were serious i even cried but when i found out that you met an accident on the spot i knew your intentions. Baby, we've been through thin and thick together, i know you won't ever do this to me. You're just afraid that i won't be able to carry on with my life just incase you left.. you did that for insurance, to assure i live on. I just wanted to let you know that you will never be a burden for me even if you can't walk, i would love to carry you for the rest of my life. Honey, please don't be afraid of anything because i am here for you, even if you continue rejecting me i will be waiting till the day you accept me. I will never leave you, because if it was me on this bed right now i'm very sure you would have done the very same thing for me. Loving you had been the happiest thing that ever happened in my life, and i will never let my happiness run away. Layla i love you because you are you, not because you can walk or run. Please stop torturing yourself, because you are not only hurting yourself it hurts me to see you getting hurt."

When he said those words to me i cried like there is no tomorrow. I hugged him so hard.
I didn't know how he figured it out, but it is as if he could read my mind.

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Years passed,
and we got married. On our wedding day he said he will carry me till the days allowed him too. We weren't rich but at least we are happy together. After that day i no longer blamed the accident for taking my legs away, instead i thanked the accident for giving me such a great story to be told out.

You'll be my lover and my soul forever and always.