love

is unpredictable

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Straw-Berriez.BlogSpoT.CoM
As we grow older together, As we continue to change with age, There is one thing that will never change. . .
I will always keep falling in love with you.
Karen Clodfelder-

152Th Post.


Everything could have been different if you would have dropped your ego and asked me first. It could have been you. Unfortunately you didn't. Watching me in envy, jealousy, and wishing i was still by your side... Do you know back then, when you said we were just friend how bad those words hit me. I didn't give up~ i looked for the reason instead. Stupidly hoping. When i found out the reason... i know why you left. You remember those words i told you. You are just plain afraid that you would end up to be the person that i mentioned before.


I still waited.... waiting till the day that you will give up. But you always say... and will never do. Whenever i tell you that someone else is after me you will just get all jealous, telling me how bad they are and how much they sucked. Yet you didn't once admit. Your egoistic self is what i hated most. Even infront of the girl you most love you'll never admit. Undo time? do you think it is possible? i wished it was. I really do. I wished i have never said it. I wished i admitted tht i do love you. I wished i said yes. But its all not gonna happen anymore. Past is always past. End is end. The feeling i have towards you now is just hatred. All those things you said to me make me hate you more and more. You didn't even take the initiative to apologize to me. Once again your stupid egoistic self. Those things you said is unforgivable. Joking? please even a blind can see that you are not!

-You call me childish? you are way worst!-

151Th Post.

Okay~ rewind back to the past.

-23/09/07-

History for both of us. ( me & Ivan )
Yup, the day that i agreed to give him a chance. Tommorow will be our first week aniversary!
But the both of us will be too busy to actually celebrate or to remember the day.

I still remembered the time when he asked me. I was on my way to the clinic coz i was sick. LOL! what a way to remember how your bf first told you that he had a crush on you! sick plus more sick~ He might not know, but i somewhat have a feeling that he adored me.~ What i didn't expect was that he'll ask at that time. So freaking fast..... O.O

He told me ,
"do you remember that i asked you for my birthday present?"
"my wish on my birthday was actually for you to give me a chance"
"This present... only you can give it to me"

haha! derno true or not.... -.-
Okay~ after one week... i finally gave in and said yes. Well, not really lar~ i seriously gave up thinking dy~ so i just said Yes.

Well... thats how it all started. Then..... he showed me to his family members.
Eg : Aunty, uncle, mum,sister,neice,cousin.................

He is such a terrifying bf i tell you.... never tell me in advance summore~ suddenly only~ Then tease my face like tomato lagi~ hellooo shy one leh~ Then.. my turn to tell my side of my family~ then dadi saw him on webcam too~ I think it shocked him coz dadi came in like suddenly~ his face pulak went red~~ =P

150Th Post.

(Ivan's Birthday Part 1)

Today, 27th September 2007.
Ivan Chong's birthday.
He asked me out for a date.
so I agreed.

LoL, i'm not that evil to reject a birthday boi's wish. =)
When i reach home looking at my beautiful,soft, & lovely bed. Seriously i wanna ffk him edy~ haha!! Then saw his messages. So yeah i went.

Today at school was HAVOC. i mean me. Rushing 6 reports, 3 exercises & Money from classes! With only 1 hour of free period! The best thing is, in that 1 hour our relief teacher JUST HAVE to teach math.Luckily manage to finish everything. With peices of my hair cut out by.... our favourite teacher. Mrs.LOO because i was cutting paper, finishing HER work during HER class.(physics)

Location : Jaya
Reason :Because it is Near his house -.-

My boyfriend is so not romantic! our first date was at McD. How can he.... sad case~
So yeah~ daddy fetched me there. Before that he had to go to the bank to do something n nvr inform me... on the way there i was smsing my bf.

Ivan : When you reach call me okay.
Me : Okay~ why?
Ivan : I might be late.
Me : Tsk, tsk tsk... how can you? first date edy late.. haih~
*seriously before he tell me i edy knoe* ( i was hoping~ omg he better not give me any suprises)
Ivan : Sorry lar~ i reach dy... but i need to go buy something...
Me : Buy what??
Ivan : Something lar...............
Me : Owh i see. Anyway.. dadi going to bank now to drop his bank draft. He say go take my glasses first worh coz its near.
Ivan : har? aiyo~ never tell me earlier~ nevermind. Reach dy call me.
Me : Kay~
Ivan : See you later!

##Reached destination## bid dad gdbye~ told him come pick me abt 4.30 to 5.00. I'll call =)

Open the door~ Look right & left. Not there! predictable.. he must be upstairs. Walks up~ While smsing him~ "where are you?" looks on top! there he is~

Yelled Happy Birthday to him. He stuffed me a present. O.O i was like.......

Me : My birthday or yours? haha!
Ivan : Aiya~ dun care lar for you~ you are special werd~~~
*he damn shy dy*
Me : LOL! thanks!! ^^ whats in it?
Ivan : Guess lar~
Me : dun tell me its a pig.
(i am smart, indeed it was)
Ivan : dunnoooooo~~

Introduced me to his friends. (Wayne , Ashwin, Kenny )
Actually can skip that part~ LOL coz on their blogs i saw all their faces dy~ summore i've met Wayne before xD

Skip,Skip,Skip... i damn lazy wan type edy lar~

One part.. he tried to hold my hands konon-nyeee wan be the third one lar~
If so easy hold my hands then i'm =) not Evelyn lor. xO

149Th Post.

Ivan's Birthday Part 2.

~Us~ he actually pulled me out to the sun to get a nice picture and not our shadows. LOL

148Th Post.

Job Well Done! I was the first to message him n wish him Happy Burfday. =)
"A year older, a year wiser"

Hereby i wish,

Ivan Chong Sai Khong Happy Bird Day. Whops i mean Birthday !

!

Hopefully you will enjoy your year! This year with more new things to come, new challenges to face. Just remember always be Yourself.

From,
Evelyn a.k.a ChuLui, Wai Sek Chu, Dear, Lan Fen Chu, Lan Chu~ gosh and wtv name you give me lar =.="

~love ya!~ muaxxkk! ( don't jump up n down when you read this i know you will! )

147Th Post.

Sometimes i wonder why is my school growing bitches. Their jobs are just to bitch about others & then boast about their imaginary lives. I feel pathetic towards them, its like they can't get real! "Owh, every week i have a guy telling me 'I Love You' ". Come on! please do wake up from your own fairy tale. Even superstars can't charm guys this badly!

Crap! Exam is like 7 days away. F.U.C.K!

I don't care this sick have to get better! Ugh! if it takes me to swallow the whole bottle of my cough mixture i will!!! i just don't wanna get sick anymore!!! T.T Being sick every single month isn't fun at all!! everyone keeps on saying that i'm 'weak' . I'm not! its just that i never get enuf of rest all the time thanks to freaking projects, homeworks, exams and what not problems!



I'm gonna be some laughing stock at school in no time. I don't care my phone is so gonna be OFF for 2 weeks. My msn too. I mean what i say this time!!! i have to!



My brains is getting weak... so weak that i can't absorb ANYthing that i read. I have to re-read abt 10 times to get one page on my mind! does that sound bad enuf to let ya'll think that i'm gonna fail my end year? There is more to come. Like having to study 10 subjects in 7 days? Haha! lets see how many 9G's i can bag home this time.YAY! Owh lets pick my nice class next year! 4SA? 4SB? I wish!



Anyone wanna join me to DROP class? owh yeah didn't i tell you streaming is god damn fun. NOT! Evelyn can never buck up coz she's stupid.



Currently waiting for the clock to strike 12. Need to wish someone Happy Birthday & ffk him tmr! =) I'm ffk queen btw. Never trust me xD HAHA! Tease me till so fun. Padan Muka just now someone's face was boiling red. =P



~I know the printscreen is so perfect! Thank You!~



"Love me just the way i am, don't you ever dare change me."

146Th Post.

Today, 26th September 2007.
Boy, today sucked to the max~ Early in the morning I have to be a slave to teachers and help them set up the fucking LCD screen. Something went damn wrong with my luck that i can't see the remote in the bag. So, we ( me & Ling ) searched HIGH and LOW for it. Ugh~ and it ended... the freaking thing was there ALL ALONG. =.="

That Koko survey thing was also done today. It is just pure stupid fun. The reason they picked our class is because half of 4SB-ians are super active in their koko. I mean..., we are practically the only class that is THIS active in koko but fail in academics.

Tommorow is *cough* iv *cough* an's *cough* birthday. I have no idea wad to get him. In addition, 'time-less' to go buy anything. Well, he'll just have to be patient and wait till i give him his belated pwezzie. (^.^) FYI, its very hard to get presents from me okayy.. be thankful. =)

Great~ In tuition i just have to forget to switch my phone to vibration mode..... tada~ ling shin heard my phone message and became VERY curios. I ignored the message switched it to vibration mode and kept it on the table... and it vibrated again. ( she stared at me of course -.-) i replied the person tht messaged me.. 'in tuition' & it vibrated again~ Therefore, Ling Shin streched her hands out and grab my phone. *give me!!!*. The secret revealed. Gawd, she went on telling Pn.Leow too. Ughh~ So throughout the class they are laughing at me. Congratulations Evelyn! you have been named 'JOKE for the day' . Special thanks to Ling Shin converting me into a laughing stock.

Seriously if i can.... i would have smacked massaged her face!

Mrs Soo : "whats wrong with you two today ar?"
? & ? : " hahahahaa!! *smiled* "
Mrs Soo : " I think is because of my son lar! Must hide him away the next class " *evil laughs*
? & ? : "HAHAHA.. TEACHER... ! " =.="

"I aim for perfection"

145Th Post.

Oh My Gosh~ I said it out. haha. Yes i did =) Of all times why this time? i derno.. i just don't..
a random printscreen =)



Complaining abt the lag-ness of Msn Live Messenger. Haha!

I grew fed-up with anonymous freaks. Thus, i locked my tag board~ sorry for the inconvenience caused.

Blogreaders that always care to tag i'm so sorry~ i'll create a private one as soon as i can.

~lurves~

142Th Post.

School sucks a big time. A very long *sigh*
For once i thought school ends at 1.30pm. Then when it was 1.00pm everyone started packing~ i was like, eyh... where is everyone going? Yes i am that blur.

Had my eyes checked today. Yesterday checked my eyes at Venice Optical. I find my vision is quite bad lately so i decided to go get a checkup. She checked and said that my power did not increase... instead i have contracted this disease called 'lazy eye' on my right. Mum got scared because 'lazy eye' may lead to blindness, so as a precaution she took me to an eye specialist to confirm this. So we went to the family eyespecialist =)

Well, according to Dr Pritam... I do not have such thing called the 'lazy eye' BUT my power on my right eye had increased by the double. Owh, and that was because the glasses that i have worn for a year is underpower. Great! now i knoe the reason why i can't see properly. From now, i have to wear my glasses all the time. sheesh! Conclusion, never trust optometrist. Btw, gonna get new glasses on thursday. xD

141Th Post

The defination of childish

Childish, infantile, childlike refer to characteristics or qualities of childhood. The ending -ish often has unfavorable connotations; childish therefore refers to characteristics that are undesirable and unpleasant: childish selfishness, outbursts of temper. Infantile, originally a general word, now often carries an even stronger idea of disapproval or scorn than does childish: infantile reasoning, behavior. The ending -like has pleasing or neutral connotations; childlike

I really wonder when can all these people stop being childish? Is it really fun going into people's private lives?? Those foolish little kids can scram their asses off my blog because YOU ARE NOT WELCOMED here! Little kids that think of themselves so greatly are just rubbish! Mere RUBBISH!

-Fools-

14oTh post.

Okay, I broke all the 5 rules i set for myself. Evelyn is such a pushover.
I finally gave an answer, that was pretty amazing. =)
Never thought that it could be that simple. Haha! anyway basically, i don't really knoe wad i'm gonna answer minutes back. Yeah... well, decisions got to be made anyhow.

~mere illusion~

139Th Post.

Evelyn is going to ;

1) Switch off her PHONE.
2) Off her Live Messenger.
3) Say No to YOUTUBE broadcasting (anime & movies.)
4) Stop blogging
5) No more astro or tv!

Evelyn is officially going to shift to some place called the 'cave' until her exams are over. To contact her you have to..... Go to her house and thats if you know the address. Haha!~ No worries she didn't disappear or something =)

Thank you to all her blogreaders that have been a fan of this blog. I'm sorry that she have to break such a sad news. =) Her guilt made her stop blogging and concentrate on her studies till her exams are over x) She will be back! Till then.. do miss her x)

She will still blog whenever she finds time though. If anyone of you see her breaking any of the above 5 rules. Just whack her without mercy. x)

~lurvessss~

138Th Post

I wanna wear braces! Pn. Leow say i'll look very pretty if i get my teeth done O.O *flattered*
I guess my face went bright red when she said that!

Pn leow commented that my lips is very thin and very its nice to look at. Half the time when we were doing add math question... i guess she was staring at me. Thats so funny. Then she said my teeth made me look as if i'm not neat.... T.T so if i get it fixed i'll look perfect!

Yar! i wanna get it done too. Unfortunately 'my mum'..... So yeah forget it!

When i was bathing just now... as i look at my naked self on the mirror... damn! i have two different skin tone! My two hands is like dark~ and my tummy is so freaking fair... Ugh! this is so ugly~~~~~ *screams* i wanna lock myself up in the house for a year. No ultraviolet light touches my skin and i'll be as fair as snowwhite xD

Yeah I wished.

137Th Post.





I changed my blog song. I find this song very sweet. Sang by Iron & Wine. I had to upload it because i couldn't find it anywhere else.

This is the album =) Hope you all will enjoy the song~

Damn! Evelyn is bloating up. Yes, as a matter of fact i am fat. *runs.fast.&.bang.her.head.to.the.wall* Seriously exam is making my body out of shape. Why?!?! like herlowww~~ exam causes stress then stress causes me to eat & eat & EAT !!!! so... does it ring a bell why i am PHAT? *runsaround&startscreaming*

Ways to lose weight! no more junk food missy! no more candiessss! no more bugging melvin to get you more loli! no more carbonated drinks! no more supper! no more purchasing oily food! LASTLY, obviously no more FAST FOOD!

Hey! speaking of fast food... i haven't eaten mcD in a looong while! damn wanna eat later. The taste of my double cheeese burger will be like heaven...!! WAIT!!!!!! *angelpopedout* "Hey you just mentioned something about losing weight!?! DO NOT get it for your lunch." *devilpopedout* "who cares... you still have months to come in losing weight. GO GET it girl*

Gah! food = calories, calories = gain weight, gain weight = not pretty, not pretty = *laughters*. So not gonna happen! McD is off my lunch list.. my heavenly burger~~ *sobbingbadly*

Guess i was a littleeee too dramatic =) anyway yeah! so its the starting of a healthy eating pyramid. Yuck!!

135th Post.




Haha! see mine is wayy cuter thn hers =)

133 th Post - lol i lost count for the last post this is to replace it =X

I seriously despise those freaking irresponsible human beings!
"yes i promise she will give you the report"
Give shit izit? i dun come find you also you DON'T FUCKING come tell me you NEVER bring it and she very well know IT IS FRIDAY!

She is just so freaking IRRESPONSIBLE! I as the leader have to suffer for her. She is so off my list and i so mean it! If the teacher weren't in the class, hell yeah i'm gonna screw her! she just happily looked as if she didn't see me! ugh! annoying the shit outta me. Hey woman! i didn't pick this blardy post okayyyy, you were da one dat shouted my name OUT LOUD.

* sry for the vulgars *

Today, is Miss Azrin's last day in SA. She was sweet enuf to make us all bookmarks with different comments on them which is so sweet~ ^^

Evelyn!!! exam is near! you've got to study! like now!
Ugh! yesterday skipped skewl then i must write MY OWN letter today. That isn't bad enuf dad had to grumble n grumble abt the letter. Ugh! hello! informal will be enuf for her! PLUS she won't even really care. All they wanna do is to make sure that your parents knoe you are at HOME! get it? do you seriously expect me to spend 30 min to type an official letter just because i miss school one day? LIKE hell no! Plus the letter is supposed to be typed by guardian/parents! So if you dun wanna do it for me, n i'll have to do myself don't grumble!!! i am STILL sick FYI.

I have officially met Melvin for 2 months haha! i was just talking wif him at msn just now. LOL! this is so weird~ 2 months and its like i've known him for ages..

~chiao~

134th POST

Melvin is a cow of all times!

If he sees this i am so dead! =X but owh well, he is a cow admitted for himself. -.- A loser of all times! Always giving me unwanted answers whenever i pop him questions pfft.

My lil' caveman is busy wif his coming SAT, A'lvl trials and A'lvl itself. This is all caused by his own stupidity. Boi! i miss him scolding me. He doesn't have the time to do so. *sob* (FYI i'm not crazee) If that caveman ever gets his arse to NUS ( National University Singapore ) i am so so so so gonna miss him. Although he lives in a cave but sometimes that makes him the way he is. =D. A person as smart as he is but can still do the most silliest things ever! (stupid things i gotta say! =X ) haha! If he's not the way he is, then wad makes him a modern age CAVEMAN eyh??

132th Post.


I met him. The last thing that i ever wanted to do.

Why? just why i have to see his shadow... its like bringing me back to a historical site. I just have to Thank God he didn't notice i was there. I was totally blurred out when i met him. Although it wasn't really considered as meeting him.... Looking at his back. Still as sexy as ever. His body frame.. *sigh*

"pASt is To bE fOrgoTteN"

It really is easier said then done! After all those unforgivable things he had done. Evelyn you've really got to wake up!! This type of guy are even worst than trash that you can dig up from a bin!! It is just so fucked up to still have this feeling in me. So freaking fucked up!

131th Post.

I actually looked like hilary =O

OMG OMG OMG OMG. I can't concentrate on my studies because whenever i sit there i start coughing like some idiot freak. Its either that OR i'd have a box of tissue with mme blowing my trumpet nose.

& you all said that younger siblings are annoying, this is WAY worst!

My current phone wallpaper ^^ hehe~~

I am as lazy as garfield =) , I am as chubby as garfeild , I am as cute as garfield x)

Skipped school today because i was having a bad headache, still coughing and obviously i still have runny nose. It's as if my nose is bleeding profusely. -.-

Note : coughing every blardy second ain't fun AT ALL!

Knowing that Mrs Loo is gonna murder me tmr for skipping school... i'd better get those books that she wants, all done by today!

Exam comes nearer again, i still don't feel the pressure YET. That is not a good sign. If i kick my ass and start studying now i can still wish to pass my papers. On the other hand if i don't.... don't think i'll need to mention what will the outcome be anymore.

-random-

I just went thru some of my juniors blogs. Gawd, did it reminded me of the past. Everything seem worry-less when we were young. Staying back all the time, as if we are living in the school. Precious time with all your friends. "past is history & it is to be forgotten" . It all is the starting of ;

how best friends drift apart, how you start to bitch about others, how you start to gossip, how you get backstabbed, how you forgive & forget, how you become friends back but yet it's just different.

This is mostly every girls high school story about...

I'm back from tuition! i seem to blog more lately & i wonder why... o.o

Wow! being at tuition seriously was fun~ we didn't even noticed that we went all the way OVER time until her son bang in da room telling he had to go tuition. Haha! & teacher still wanted to continue until i say~ OMG teacher almost 5 edy~ i think my dad outside ready~
Pn. Leow gave us chicken biskuts to eat during class ^^
Unfortunately ling shin seemed to be living in a cave all this while, coz she said she haven't eat it before~ & she loveeesss it! -,- shud get her ONE big packet for her burfday.

OMG! i'm still coughingggggg~~~ so frigin irritatinggggggg~~!!!~~!!

Today, 19/09

Exam is drawing nearer and nearer. My memory is getting poorer -,-
Ugh my sick is irritating me badly. I can't get peaceful sleeps. During class i blow my nose till its about to fall. I bet everyone is so irritated with me. Plus i cough every single fcuking second! Eating porridge is just so sickening~

Cumulated physics work need to be handed in. Gosh~ i'd probably fail my end year exams~ i have no time to study at all. Its either i'd be too sick to do so, or too lazy. The rest will be timeless~

This is such a tough decision. I have been questioned today. someone asked me why am i so close to him.. O.O i said i derno... which is true! hey i really derno why am i close to him also werd~ we are just yea..~ close.. she kept on hinting something to me. "owh i like him" "not really like lar~ but yea you knoe i just do, aihh~ our relationship very complicated one ler." Heck! so now wad am i suppose to do? "hmm, we nuthing lar~ he nvr tell me anything bout you also" thats all i can answer *smiled n walks off*

So say yes and be a bitch of all times? you knoe i can't. I seriously dislike people hating me.

Well, tuition is like 30 more min i better go get ready~
~lurvess~

grrrrr, this cough is so annoying me! I can't sleep coz i kept coughing grrrrr.... fuck it! n i still have school tmr!!! this is so frigin annoying!!!!

Owh btw, everyone says my bag is nice ^^
da one my sis bought from malacca! ^^
Thank You Angelineee! =)

~gotta chatch some sleep before i die~

yeah~ i forgot to mention dat someone actually stared at me today. -Pathetic-
Hey, come one don't be jealous just coz you think i SAT your place -.- , FYI charl asked me to sit there~ if you wanna sit there voice out next time! I'll be nice enuf to say sorry and give you the place YOU WANTED.

When teacher wanted to switch on the LCD

Charl : ***** please help. ^^
HER : "Take a chair lar!"

Trying to say i'm short? hello you are not taller than me by feets! plus charl asked you super nicely, next time you'd better not give her "that tone" i swear i'll slap your face if you ever do that to her again!!

Its no doubt why they purposely let you hear words when they're abt to leave the class. Its purposely for you to hear! i have to admit its rude but you deserved it!

Stare stare stare.. i very pretty izit now? until you cannot take you eyes off me? please lar see you face i feel like *puking* , It just reminds me of everything! *vomit*

I have been told he went on with another girl. After the incident i think its another 2 girls that received the same fate. Owh well, its her fault for not listening, she can blame no one.

- I'm proud of myself i admitted! -

Just minutes ago my sis have left to malacca. She'll be working dere.. gonna miss her ^^

hmm, sometimes i just hate my 6th sense. Its a gift or rather something weird i have since young. I do like it. its almost like a special ability... but sometimes having it just gives out all the suprises. & making everything harder to be decided.

I totally need tuition during the holidays before i die for SPM next year. Finals are around the corner and i am sick. =.= i have no time to actually sit down and study~ pfft. A reason whole year round.

Doctor actually said that i can fight the bacteria & did not give me antibiotics -.- She also thought i was my sister.. do we really look THAT alike? O.O

Today i was half dead at school~ used 3 packets of tissue. SOB SOB! my nose is totally falling!
something really funny happened. shin was bullying Sara den i disturbed her n pulled her weird black shoes. and she berteriak XD
Sara : owh she sounded like a girl!
Evelyn : HAHHAHAHAH!! so you mean she sound like a boy all this while?? xD ling shin hear that larr... tsk tsk tsk, you sound like a boy all this while hahahaha!!
Ling Shin : *stares at Sara* Thanks ALOT! hmmpppfft.
Evelyn : chan.. write down your burfday! =)
Ling Shin : Owh chan is an OLD KID~~ hahahahaah!!
Chan : *passes me back the book* yeerr i dwn write edy lar!!
Evelyn : aiya! you old kid nvr mind~ at least better than someone that only sounded like a GIRL SECONDS jus now x)
Chan, Sara, Me : *laughs*

##He's a man to be. Very brave. =) On the other hand, there are just cowards that hides themselves. What i don't want is "conflict". ##

On friday i wanted sooo much to get sick just to skip school and make sure my add math projct was perfect. Bah.. sick? wish again.



Right after i finished all my projects and my 2 chem folio's.... basicaly half the stuffs. I catch a flu, & currently having bad soar throat.

fuck fuck fuck! sick during weeks before exam again. hate it!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I AM SICK.
cough* cough* sneeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeZEee* cough* cough*

haha! i gotta admit talking wif dat idiot was fun~ made me laugh the whole time =P i even ditched someone coz i was talking to him O_O ( see, see! you so grand okay~~~)

"we are not destined together. & i shall not go against what have been destined."

Maybe this is true afterall. We are just not fated to be together =) i'll accept what it is. You'll just be my friend like what we said before. I think we just can nolonger be best friends anymore. i can sense you avoiding me already. I'm sorry if what i said was harsh~ someday you'll probably thank me. I knoe wad i said wasn't nice & its all going against your imaginary princess. Without scolding you, all you will do is just remain in your own world. I'm so sorry. I regretted what i said. Just so i want you to knoe, you can't guarantee anything. You may be here today & be gone tommorow. Think of what i said. Its hard to accept but a fact is a fact.

Haha! "someguy" keep on blaming me because he's BROKE! erhm i didn't even use one sen of his. ppfffffttt. SEE SEE, always bully me~~~ i tell YOU MUMI den you knoe! haha!! He blame me coz he's sleepy tsk tsk tsk.. wad kinda kid is that! i ask him sleep he say he dwn den he blame one me O.O summore say nvr BULLY ME.

"liar, liar pants on fire arrr" hear before anort?? lol OPS its suppose to be your butt on fire coz you dun wear pants HAHAHAHAA!!! eyh!! remember your dare arh~! i'll make sure you do it someday wakakaka!

haha..=)..im back again..XD...Yawn~~!~~YAWN!!~~~!..thanks to someone that make me so YAwn!~~..lol..yesterday i promise 1 girl (WHICH IS ME) that i going to online at 2..and i seriously did.. (pppppfffttt.. its not GRAND!) somemore i never late...my time sharp 2 i on9..lol..XD...oh well....chat with her...can be so crazy....chat until none stop..=)( coz he damn siaonesss)..
and always say that I BULLY HER~!!!!SWT!!!i never bully u ...=X..i just talk only la..haha..XD..its true what i say la..hehehe( HELLO!! i have PROOF YOU BULLY ME OKAY! )...then chat until almost 4+..i want sleep..my sis dont let me sleep and ask me teman her...so ...i contninue online...still chat with her....chat until 4+...then we offline lo..see how good am i let her off9..XD ( HE DIDN'T LET ME OFFLINE! EASILY! pffft) ...then....still sms..=.="""""" ( COZ SOMEONE SAY WANTS TEMAN) .......make me sleeep at around 5...ZZzzzzz..btw...so fun chat with u..hhahhaha now so ...YAwn!!!~~~~~~~YAwn!!~~~ ( LOL YOU IDIOT!!!!) its fun coz you owiz bully me!!

Here i am blogging again!
i just finished my chemistry folios! yipee! & i still can't sleep because i still have too much to do. my hmw list had finally reached 100 and over. now its at the point of 116.

i'm so tired yet i can't let myself sleep any longer. Even typing now half my eyes is close. Just now on my way back to school the stop at the traffic light seemed lik forever. & i just closed my eyes. It felt like i slept for an hour.... but my brains is still thinking yet not resting~
*sigh*

i am so stressed up! i need a break, i want someone to complain to. i want to cry on someone's shoulders. I can't stand this anymore. I tried as hard as i could to keep myself awake in class. Even 5 min of sleep in class felt sooo good. i'm in a bad desperation of sleeping. SLEEEEEEP i want SLEEEP.

my life is just so pathetic.

It just freaking kills your mood to continue paying attention in that stupid add math class. Owh when finally all those students she dislike much get to answer the questions. She said tht we are annoying. *****! sorry no offence but its da truth.

"If you all learn at tuition edy then just keep quiet and listen"

See how much i hate her? anyway i wasn't really answering haha~ i was half doin my 3K work under the desk =X anyway wad she said still terkena me abit coz i answered abit of her questions too. SO hate her. When she walk i quickly stuff all my things under the desk n pretend doing her work. which i understand nuthing =X now i knoe why i fail math in the early of the year!

Yay! one project down 2 more folios. syteeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee. i need time. i need time. i need time. i need time. i need time.

my weekends is flooded with work ;
Math x3 - coz i haven't finish her last two classes work -.-
Add Math exercise
English essay & some shit tables gawd knoes wad she's asking for.
Physics 3 lab reports
Moral F & J
Moral PATS (esei)
Add Math (tuition)
English (text book)
BM (karangan) & BM (rumusan)
Physics (bab 4) exercise
Sejarah (bab 8) exercise
Chem folio x2
Sejarah nota (bab 9 & 10)

My life sucks.

& i cried again.


I'm just too stressed out! i swear to you i can jump down a building this instance. Despite the fact of having to hand in my Add Math project today and the load of hmw she gives you & to be finished by one day. I still need to face PEKA! she only gave us one day notice. Half the class was sitting outside the lab today. I was lucky enuf to scribble my way thru 30 min before i get my ass to school. I have to mumble in Losh's ears telling her every second *OMG! i'm not done with my math hmw! i got no time how?* I bet she got sooo fed-up of me. I had to skip 30 min of eng lesson just to get a pat on my head from Pn C. =.= how pathetic! she was asking me to shift her moral stuffs BY FRIDAY so i had to! ugh, having to hunt down 'freaks' for the reports is just so sickening! I AM SICK OF IT! SICK SICK SICK! asking them in other words almost down on my knees pleading them a thousand times just for their reports. I seriously dunno WTF they are doing! Its as if they all nvr do their duty. & i always get the blame. why? coz i am da KETUA *eyes roll* Pn Hamimah few days ago just COMPLAINED saying why aren't "THEY" doing their job,& that includes me of course. -,-

HATE IT! fucking hate it.

School is so sickening. I can't sleep. I have no idea why the most i can go for is just 4 hours. I am too worried about all my works being undone. I can't sleep in peace although i am VERY very tired. Like ling shin says this really shortens our live's by years!!! i have a shocking wake from sleep all the time. Am i abnormal?

I felt like crying again, after i cried i felt much much better. =D

"life's full of obstacles but facing too much at one go is scary"

I can't handle it, i'm not strong enough. i broke down.
Maybe it was just stress or something, but i just felt so freaking horrible.

The way he treated me is just so freaking unfair. I've always been complaining about that freaking "nose shit" allowance that they are supplying me. To them its more than enough. In reality its called starve yourself to death. I can never save, never save any cash. Thus i can't usually get the stuffs that i WANTED to buy. i had to always depend on him. Depend depend depend. Always giving me that look when i wanna get something for myself as if i ask for it every fucking second.

WHAT I DID. WHAT I DID. WHAT I DID.

Do i give shit? have you ever think of WHY I DID THT instead?

Everytime going out whenever i see anything nice or what i wanted i nvr voice out its because i'm with my sisters and its just not gonna be fair to them if they spend alot for me. when i go out wif him it seems Rm 5 is all i worth. His daughter is only worth of Rm 5 yay! I'm not angry about anything but even after i SAID it he's still acting all dumb and stupid about it.

FYI, pls stop dragging this topic to MY STUDIES! for your fucking information i will NOT, will NEVER ask you for money for my future studies. THANK YOU!

I might act like a kid all the time, but i am not one! I think on others behalf coz i'm not some selfish lil brat!

Ya i always mix with the wrong ppl. i am too naive to think for myself thats why i need you to help me. ya i am stupid. ya i can't study. ya i am dumb. ya i am a fool. I'm just some nobody around. Aren't i?

Meeting them was just faith. It was also by accidental. and FYI the way i meet my friends wasn't really coz of tuition. & FYI you stopped me not coz i mix around wif the wrong friends or coz you are scared. YOU KNOE THE REASON VERY WELL! its because i always fail and you think its a wasting YOUR MONEY.(its not about the money you were saying? STOP BULLSHITTING THANK YOU!) From a fail to a pass you call that no difference? from a pass to a B3 you call that no difference? WOW! i suggest you go get a calculator.

Its just so fake those fucking reasons you give are just FAKE! it changes all the time. Mixing with the wrong friends. I find this real funny. Okay i got to admit the fact that some of them smokes. & so? smoking doesn't tell a person bad does it. They are just normal human beings. They have a life to. Sometimes descriminating is just not the way. They have feelings too they do too felt descriminated! and what makes them worst is all those ppl that descriminates others!

" Its nice meeting you. But i suggest you don't mix around wif us so much"
" I don't think your parents will like us "
" as in.. you know the way we are and all ryte? "

He knoes, they knoe. They all do. I was shocked when he told me this last time. I really was. Its because i never mentioned a word about my parents. NEVER once.

The funniest smoker that i would have ever met is dat cow! hmm.. an ex smoker i got to say now ^^ .

"OMG i wonder when will my lungs turn black?"
"its already black & your gonna die next year =D"
" yar i guess so. "
" want me to send you the research i did last year? ^^ bet you'll quit smoking after that! "
" NO!! i dwn, my friend just sent me. i dwn to see all those horrible pictures anymore!"
" you knoe its bad and you are still hanging around wif it. You are not making anysense!"
" sometimes its just not easy to quit "
" summore say wan donate your lungs to others, as if you can =.=!"
" ...... "

I'm proud of you that you actually quit smoking once again. & this time is for yourself. I don't wish to see you starting again. REMEMBER you DID SOMETHING FOR YOURSELF.

I woke up by MYSELF at 1am. i'm shocked. I think stress is driving me a lil to far. The desperation to actually be perfect. Somewhat i think i tried to hard. It never worked. I am about to give up. I can't sleep lately. closing my eyes means thinking of work. I can't let go of homeworks,studies, books and worst of all problems. I actually felt so much better after crying. They say crying is a way to relief stress.i guess its true.

pffffttt.. dat idiot freak guard called me a malay gurl! wtf is wrong with her eyesight? which freaking part of me look like a MALAY GURL? like helllooooo look at my skin colour!! this is like da blardy 1st time ppl had actually mistakken about me being a malay. Gawd dat guard talk dam freaking lot. So hate her! call me a malay gurl~ wanted to shoo me outa the canteen summore. *stares at her*

Haha! when she was talking Tarsha gave the damn irritated look. We all just went like arr.. arr ya! tau! ya!!! stupidfreak.=.= Pn . Norinda n the whole class was just gossiping about her in da morning. &during recess here she comes.

Of all people someone just have to come shouting my full name. Gawd i hate it okay~ hardly anyone calls me by my full name. All except some annoying brat (Melvin). He always does that to annoy me, it seems so fun to him just to make me irritated. Stamp da L on his forehead *irritated look* hmm.. back to story. Owh she shouted out loud just to tell me she stopped yoga class for a month coz of exam. O.O erm, seriously she don't need to report it to me. It seems like she's a lil desperation for a friend or something? Its not that i'm against her or anything~ i do pity her. But she just freaks me out! For example suddenly popping out a Question "how are you & Melvin" o.O the looks on her face is like telling me dat i have something to do wif him, or i've coupled wif him n stuff. Plus she sorta drags you to talk wif her... then she started telling me she haven't got a bf before, although most of her friends like brag about it. Then she said she doesn't want to have one n all.. O.O *thinks* i'm not that close to you why u suddenly telling me all this? me n Mel are just very close friends. Plus hello? those jakoons from kjg high just like to play~ ( coz their jakoons of course) plus when you get close to them their just gonna be real close friends to you. Why do you treat them as if they wanna couple wif you or something. Its such childish thoughts. Deleting them from ur msn list just coz they send forwarded emails? I think you better not add me then. Plus wad are emails for if they don't get sent out? just so when she talks i don't think she quite uses her brains. Yes she is smart and all! But she BRAGS about it. Hate that!
*her* : what did jan get for bio?
me : erm 25 i think.
*her* : owh..
me : you got back your marks yet?
*her* : nope not yet, who's highest for bio in yr class?
me : erm kathijah i think..
*her* : owh wads her marks???
me : 31
*her* : whoa, over 40 ryte?
me : erm no. 50.
*her* : har? 50..? don't you think its like kinda low??
me : smiles n WALK OFF~

FYI , i got 29 if you say the highest marks is low, indirectly you are telling me too. Plus is like telling dat my class is some stupid class or something. Yes jan is smart but she don't go bragging abt it. Yes she ask for other ppl's marks but she don't go saying its low and all. You so smart wad YOU get? bet not any higher or probably same. Coz in the whole form 4 oni shugi n aiman got the experiment part correct!!

LP3k work is driving me crazy. I got to STAND out of the class coz i went to physics class late thanks to freaking ppl dat need me to run after to get me report. Phuck them i tell you. Promised me to send it to my class i didn't even see her shadow walking past. Having me running after them like some idiot! telling me tmr cannot izit. Phuck! *one thight slap on their faces* Mrs Loo is just so freaking evil~ she knoe i had a reason but she won't let me enter class. Even when copying notes she don't let. Tsk! i told her i had a reason then she was like.... look at me, purposely made me go out get Pn Yong's signature. Tsk! so i had to run to get Pn Yong to write me a permission slip for her. =.= then when i gave her the paper. She was like YOU SURE this is Pn Yong's signature. pfffttt, i told her t'cher! you can go staff room ask her NOW! she's there! =.= then Pn. Yong heard, and from outside she shouted! AIYA! you let her go in lar!!!! Haha!! yipeeeee! XD she was like OMG! is tht Pn Yong? lucky i nvr say anything bad abt her =P
See! she knew its true~ she just purposely wanna make fun of me. =.= always liddat~ like to play play play.. sometimes teacher when a student is tensed up don't play, coz that time it'll nolonger be fun. Trust me.

I nearly broke down i tell you. thank god t'cher said my add mth project was gud, just a few changes. Like wad Melvin say, yar everything seems to fall on me at one time. Its so hard to handle. & phuck i nearly forgot abt Pn . C's work. Crap she wants it done by FRIDAY! which is tmr. Pn. C i am busy okay~ always ask me do this do tht =.= ugh..

i fucking wanna cry, i wanna break down on someone's shoulder. I want to, but i knoe i can't. I just knoe i have to stand strong and handle things myself. It has always been this way, and its still gonna stick this way. I'm not gonna be like the early of the year, breaking down when i can't handle my work. It can't help. Besides it will not solve my problem.

My add math project is finally done. Only left one page, got to ask my 2nd sis about that. =)
& special thanks to all that have helped me in doing my add math project ;
Angeline (my sis) - scolding me for not asking her on the graphs earlier =X & helped me do it. Thank You very much *muakx*
Wun - Thanks for sending me yours so i have a refference. It makes my work way faster ~lurves~
Melvin - Giving me plenty moral support & thanks for offering your help =D ~HuggZz~
Hema - Telling me wad i left out x) ~allowing you to ask folskap paper from me~ =P
Shireen - For letting me browse thru yours so i'd have a rough idea how to do mine ~ <3 ~
Love you all lots~ thank you so much for helping ^^ Without you all i'd probably still be on the 1st page of my project =D

Grr.. i have a stupid project deadline to meet! phuck! idiot melvin is complaiiiining abt his pathtic assignments and saying my projects is like lil kids filling in blanks. feel like smacking his face!

school suck blardy hard!! i even have hmw nitemare's when i'm half DEAD on bed! woke up at 4am having tht bad guilt to force myself complete the hmw. but tiredness was way more den guilt so poof* back to bed. Crap! was rushing my hmw early in da morning T.T thank GOD teacher give us 1 hour free of BM so love her ^^

This stupid kelas terkotor things is driving me crazy! it is! i am serious.imagine sacrificing ur OWN time to run around whole wide school like some Ah Long. Collectin cash from every class. & ppl have to ask you why u wanna suck their class funds dry! see how sad it is? Grr.. then of all t'cher's Pn C HAD to come complain many many abt 6 Rendah getting kelas terkotor! wtf? hello t'cher it aint my job! its form 3'ssssssss i am ketua kelas FORM 4! get it? see the difference in NUMBER? or you don't?? ugh!

freaky hate myself for being famous, freaky hate myself for being responsible, freaky hate myself to give in for orders, freaky hate myself for helping others yet can't help myself! i really need to learn something called REJECT! its easier said than done! i AGREE!

I got to start studying~ exam is coming! I can't procrastinate more! HELP! SCREAM!

Life's wonderful these days ^^
Everyone around me and all. Everything is so going my way. They way it all used to be. I just loved it. Finally all the good things are back. Somehow i kept looking back at the past, i don't know why.. maybe i just wanted to remind myself how horrible my life used to be & never take a wrong path to return. Letting history repeat itself is not a choice. Its not gonna happen. I'll never let it. I don't ever want to suffer again. Going through once again~i don't think i can pull thru.

As i looked back to the past yesterday, tears rolled down my eyes. Its not anything big, but the way it hurt was just so bad. It did a bad damage on me. Sometimes i think the pain is just so unbearable.

The way it all happened, is just so fast. I still remember how we used to tease each other not to fall in love, until we are deeply in love....... then it just all faded away. Sometimes i doubt myself if you've ever loved me. Or is it infatuation? maybe just a crush.

It is like making me come into your life and kick me back out. I was just so lost that time. I just lost my directions. I don't knoe who i can turn to, for you are always the one i go to if i have any problems. You left me just like that without turning and looking back. & i still have to love you.
Maybe those years we've been together, those happy times, those times when you called me. When i cried to you over the phone over some stupid guy. Its all gone now. Gone forever~ do you knoe how much i hated you? yet... i still can't put you out of my mind even when it happened some time ago.

*sigh* i always say let the past be the past~ its easy to forget him~ yeah i did~ let him go yet he'll somehow flow back. Memories can't be wipe off so easily. Our brains are like thousands of CPU. The storage is much larger than the computer so is the functions. The only difference is, in a CPU files can just be simply deleted by a click of the mse. On your brains it don't work that way. It stores in there forever~ it keeps in there for a life time.

I just love school nowadays~ I love exams~ i love homeworks~
i got to love it in order to do it! i have to~ i love it! yes i do!

Chat history sucks to da max~ i had to go to dat place to check wad donkey left me~ as usual itchy hands of mine will wanna go back to the past and see what happened before. Sweet at starting yet a horrible ending.

*censored* says: today wat month n wat day r?
~B@byAnGel & B@byDev!L~ to hold you but not have you. says: 20/05/07
*censored* says: ya lo
*censored* says: 520
*censored* says: mean i love u
*censored* says: muackSS
~B@byAnGel & B@byDev!L~ to hold you but not have you. says: ^^

i found this, how painful it is to tear our hearts apart. Just how much the hurt bleed.
It can never start over again and start back the way it was anymore. Nothing can. You promised. why did you break it. why?

hmm.. Changed my mind from taking dat long holiday after all ^^ hehe~ if i dun blog i'll probably die of stress~~ i wanna write out all my feelings! Just when, will the trainee teachers scoot their ass off? gawd! i cannot stand her anymore! everyday give us paper form groups do this do tht run around in da class do nonsensical things! such a freak! She is just so free to hunt for video clips daily n waste PAPERS! does she knoe wad is save the trees? guess not! She is nice in a way but i just hate the way she teaches~ sucks a big time!

Donkey made me mad the day before yesterday~ real mad type. & i ended going off9 just like that and nvr answered his 7 calls and also his sms. Hehe, i'm really angry dat time, seriously you don't expect me to pick up his phone calls ryte xD. He apologized... err lets count 5 times! *sigh* see the reason y i can't stay mad at him anylonger~ he didn't sleep till 5 am just coz he was so worried dat i'm mad at him -.- wonder how true is that~ so i didn't speak to him for almost a day i guess! break record! coz its the 1st time i got mad at him =P

Pn. Yong i is forcing me to hand her report TODAY! & Pn. Loo don't allow me outa the class to collect the reports! see how hard it is? T.T anyway i had to tell mrs.loo damn nicely, again n again beggggiinnngg & pleeeeedingggg~ oni she let me out! phew! & all thanks to report i had to rush to copy my data!! summore need to touch up abit on my physics exercise dat needs to be handed in! Gawd~ i nearly died of tension!

Homework! homework! HOMEWORK! seriously i hate you! but i gotta say i love you in order to sit wif you for hours! i'm dating wif books everyday! books books books books books! i'll probably dream of books real soon! what a nightmare! i need sleep! i am sick! tensed! and i have alot of work to do! thus, i can't sleep. Anyone nice enuf to donate me x'tra time?

gtg!~ chiao~

I wonder if this is called love... but i think i fell in love with you. i'm confused over my own feelings~ i think i shud give a break to myself. I did loved you. Maybe i still do now. Do you think so?

*its just complicated*

This blog owner is now officially taking a long holiday from blogging~
Do miss her ^^

::.. Hate you for making me mad, thus cried & kept thinking of you ..::

Once again, she is just full of lies. Its so sad ain't it. My choice was right. The faster i leave the better! C=

Hehe, for once i goyang kaki at school! its so amazing! i went to chem lab without HMW xD
The dreadfull thing is! FINAL exam schedule sudah keluar! eff eff eff eff eff less thn a month efffffffffffffffff it!

that donkeh shud be damn happy now! Finished his test. Grr.. he'll happily watch me suffer.crap!

Hmm.. i have nuthing to blog today! i damn malas lar! haha.. nuthing much happened at school. I only know i have lotsa hmw's to do. Like y am i not doing now? coz facing them too much is so ewww-ing~ yuck!

Stupid msn connection suck blardy bad! omg yea~ sis leaving for malacca soon! once again the room all to myself! from Mon - Fri she'll be back on weekends~~ whee~

mhhmm just now went to williams n eat. GAWD! the food plate is just HUGE! HUGE HUGE HUGE! i nearly vomitted eating it! seriousss... looking at it makes you wanna die! imagine eating it. ALONE! 1 person eating a 3 persons dish sorta HUGE! scary ryte?

kay~ i shall go listen to songs now xD lazy lazy wanna blog ready~

I hate you for hiding.

I can sometimes amuse myself, that i can set my alarm at 7:30pm yet waking up at 11:30pm.

4 Hours of sleep! Haha! The reason was because of fireworks! i went to the grand finale for the fireworks competetion held at Putrajaya, the day before yesterday (its 12am now) The fireworks were just amazing! 30 min of non-stop fireworks is just perfect! Despite the fact that we need to go around asking for chairs & stuffing into the crowd! But we all knoe, we enjoyed it ^^

Today, Back to school day -.- those holidays passed so fast! sigh* my hmw still 80% complete! hmm.. well, at least it ain't 80% incomplete =) whoa! i saw how Pn. Y scolded ppl today! so scary... lucky i was hardworking enuf to drag my lazy butt to school last thursday! imagine if i didn't go too... she'll be BLOWINGGGGGGGGGGGGGG!!! phew~~ phew~~ If i were the gal i'd be shivering over dere!!! she didn't really shout like wad Pn. M usually do.. but she was like you failed your task.. i'm so disappointed in you! how can i trust you anymore! you see the reports are all wrong now! aikz! note to self- nvr repeat tht mistake or you'll die just as bad!

Sometimes i wonder how can ppl be so dishonest? If you didn't do just freaking admit lar. Do you knoe how shameful it is when you get busted in front of the whole class? people look down on you. It just shows your personality. How can you talk about others that cheated while you yourself doing it all the time? I despise you! i despise you like hell! I didn't tell you off is because i'm still respecting you as a friend. Its just too bad that teacher saw it. I'm not being bad but, you do deserve it! I was once scolded for doing the stupidest thing! teacher once gave me 20 more extra marks for BM because she wrote wrongly. I knew and yet i told her. This isn't stupid. It is the right thing to do. If i can cheat now, i still won't be able to do it later. At least ppl look up to me and not down. Just like the way i look at you. I feel disgusted. Disgusted with all the things you have done. If you itself don't walk on the straight path, pls don't talk abt others. THANK YOU! Yes someone is helping you. I do too have Hems to help me. I am not selfish. I don't like to get her in trouble. You can continue saying that others have done the same, thats because they didn't know it was suppose to be done. They still admitted after that! unlike you. continue lying! Just how many times we've caught you. Yet both of us remained silence.Sigh* *breath* i shan't tell more, then it'll be like gossiping abt others. & i won't do it. ^^

SHit! i'm addicted to milo againn........ something is so wrong with me..... but at least i dun have my feeel like vomiting cases anymore~ coz too stressed up lately & eat ALORT!!! omg i'm gaining! HELP! Ferrero Rocher is nicee yummmyy~~~~

Grr..!! screw bio! from 69 drop to 59 phuck it!!!!!!! fuck fuck fuck fuck! I was only like 5 days late. & i didn't knoe the paper as suppose to be in it! and it was COMPLETED! and so she gave me 0 and so i lose 10 marks and so from a nearly A to a grade C. FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK! 5 days late is because i didn't know i was suppose to hand it in! I'm always clumsy! can ask Hema. I finish all my work ON TIME n always forget to hand in, even chem i am like this & my book was missing she knew it!! it just ain't fair! I can't help it dat i'm born clumsy am i! its just my nature! plus during exam i took back the book!! so i handed up late & she gave me 0 AGAIN! so no fair~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ she said i am being strict this time!!!!!!!!!! fuck! at least my wor is done! at least at least i am better than those tht didn't hand in! at least give me 1 mark to get B! its just so fucking shit! GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR... UNFAIRNESS lies everywhere!

Hmm.. at least tuition was nice ^^. Pn leow supplies us goodies during class even cincau ^^ Hehe! love her~ Her doggies still very kee aiiii !!!! LoL she seemed sad about her son not wantin her to teach~ wonder why.... Haha! probably like how i told her teacher don't ask why~ LOL!

The friendship tie had just broken. Yet i'm glad it did.

It didn't just broke off like this, but i cut it off. If its so hard for me to try my best hangging there so why not just cut if off? it makes me & you feel better. You still won't understand it. Do you? still you, still as stupid as ever. I sometimes wonder whats on your brains? Is there really brains or is it grass? You nvr knoe how to think of the consequences in doing anything. Thats because you are mainly stupid even since the day i've met you. I'm sorry if this sounded like an insult but it is the truth! Maybe till the day you die you wouldn't realize why i don't speak to you anymore. To knoe the answer just ask yourself. Altough many say my openes doesn't have a limit, but sometimes just don't go overboard. Having not to hit you right on your face you're lucky, & you still in one big peice do be glad, you still standing yet talking please thank god. Not even a word of thank you came out from your mouth. Those lies you told, yet i still helped you. I helped you many but in silence yet you don't realize. Till this moment, this path that i have to take it is actually doing one thing for myself yet not for you. For once. With you still blaming me of being childish. What sorta person are you? please look in the mirror and find yourself. You don't say it out doesn't mean i'm stupid enough to not knoe. I am not you!



Okay, Happy 50th Birthday to Malaysia! We love Our country! =)
Hmm.. so here it is my merdeka days special. Same with Mr Yh haha! the difference is he needa revise for his trials n mine is end term!
Menu-merdeka day special: Set A- homework, Set B- project, Set C- revision
Idiot Melvin teased me saying dat i picked Set D - online! damit! DID not okay i finished like 1 project n 1 hmw so far haha! which is erm kinda true also lar =P n i did some research on chem folio too! comeon i need to merdeka too ryte? xP
See how i procrastinate now? LOL its very clear n obvious -.-

To everyone out there that is guessing who is my bf, pls wake up. I don't have one. When i say it i mean it. Owh yea~ i forgot i actually have one which is Seph! haha he had been my bf since wad? 1 year ago arh? 1 or 2 arh?? lupa dy! he's dat bf tht i can tease around with, scold him, and bully him all the time! He will remain as my bf forever =) Haha! so now u understand me n his relationship? Even when i have a real bf he's still mine any gals dat wnt him can shoo off~~ haha!! he is pure mine! WAKAKAKAKA~~ jkjk - Sei Fei Chai! WHOPZ!

Yesterday i went Raku-Zen. Hmm.. the deco's n all looked nice n cozy but.... but... as i sat...
Suddenly! a cockroach run out. Scary ryte! thank god it didn't fly on me. *creeeeppppzzz* The food was okay~ okay~ larhz. The most amuzing thing is! there is alot of japanese dining dere! n i saw this kinda cute guy xD *screamsss* Leng Chai okay!! haha!!

Emo cases still non-stop! lol my ears is almost bursting edy! lending it for ppl to talk n talk abt those love love emo emo cases. Sigh* i do pity them x) ERHM! i was emo-ing yest too.. i saw something tht bring me back to the past. The holding memories. Something that i have long thrown n forgotten. I Hate thinking back! i just hate it. I nolonger pay the visit back to my oldself. My other blog. As i locked it. I've nvr went back to see the past. The past of me and him. Me and another him. Another link yet to another. Its just a pity how fast those happy times past & how long it take for the sadness to presist till to date. Till now, this minute, this second. Wait for another guy to have you forget them all! another guy? another guy that is a jerk? a fool? a person that will inturn brk me into pieces once again? no thankx! i'd rather survive with myself!
I can't sympathize ppl so much. Sympathizin them all hurt myself and hurt others. I'll not be like her. I hate ppl that cheat. In order to not hate myself i won't do it.

Have she ever thought the impact that she will give to others? especially when she say that she loves him? love? did she ever understand wad it meant? I don't think she did. All she did is mixing up crushing & loving. To crush doesn't mean to love. Loving has alot of aspects to be looked upon. She doesn't think about it at all. Now... maybe i do realize how come they all left you. Your used to be clan. I do understand why they spread rumours. Although i won't. Telling it i will but its only to the ppl i'm very sure can keep it. You do think its a grand thing to do don't you? it does makes you famous doesn't it? Isn't falling once enough? how many times do you have to fall a hundred? You know... i didn't know where you left your brains. Maybe you are just too stupid to think or something.
Regret? *laughs* its useless isn't it?
The thoughts of suiciding. Great! you can go do it now nobody's stopping you.Don't you have self control? does desperation pulled you that far?

Jealousy kills people. <<< i agree wif this x)