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Monday, October 22, 2007 2:26 PM

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Its raining since yesterday night... until this morning.. do you remember what we said? if i love you it'll rain. Its just so funny that it all comes back to us.

I didn't know today was 22nd. I still thought it was 20th all thanks to my mum for putting the calender to November. 9 Days till this month ends. 4 Days till my exams are over. & about 2 weeks more till open day. The news that i don't wanna hear will be there.... 2 weeks waiting for results is crap. I screwed up all my sciences. I screwed up all my math papers. I screwed up my languages. Basically i screwed everything. Congratulations Evelyn! I'll try not to sit at one corner and start crying like an idiot over the efforts that i put in but A's are just too hard to get. Too far to be achievable. In fact i think i have to praise myself because i only picked up books after my mid terms. I'll pray hard not to fail... but i think i'll still fail chem. I know nuts on that paper. Honestly!

I screwed bio today. My brain is just so fucked up. I was so freaking stressed, i imagined the paper was going to be freaking hard. I can't sleep at all! not at all! basically yesterday i didn't sleep. My brain is just thinking of . Oh shit, i'm gonna screw everything up tmr. Early morning it started with EST paper.. I was like running for time to catch 30 min of nap. I did the paper in like 20 min. It was quite okay.. and i tried to sleep. I couldn't.... all i knoe is. Oh crap, bio... i am not ready... i am not..... eventhough i read everything but i'm so scared that when the paper come it'll be like missing! HAIH~ then pj... i basically tembak-ed a few lar. Thanks to Tarsh's text book i can answer most of it & thanks to paying attention in Pn. Norinda's class. =D
So i was still rushing like idiot, finised in 20 min time also. Wanted to sleep... i slept awhile... 5 min i guess. Then it was time. Went recess grab something to eat coz having slight gastric dy. Went back up start to chew on my bio book. When the bio paper reached.... i looked at the back, it was fairly okay.. i can still answer the essays, but when i turn to the front. Its just crap. Total shit. I answered the ones i could.. and i just went empty.. my brains can't think anymore.. i think i fell asleep on the table without knowing.... gosh! the feeling was so good! because i finally screwed up the last science paper i have no worries anymore. I can sleep. -.- I woke up there was still like 30 min's left so i fill in those empty spaces i left with bullshit answers. Just to make the paper look nice and answered. SIGH. Then during the 10 min i was like dead.. i can barely take up my hands anymore.. my head was falling eventhough i am sitting. Imagine how bad was that!

I realize that i'm no longer care free like i used to be. I normally won't even give a damn about exams. Now i do. Its foolish... everything is just so fucked up. Nightmares sucks. Even when you sleep you think of memorizing facts.. and when you can't think of your facts back up you panic and run to a book and read up again, end up you won't even sleep. This is how bad my night was.

Mrs soo told us, next year you all tuition monday kay? because ryte wed is for form 4 students.
I nearly asked her har? then why we go monday? O.O"

I am form 5 next year. I am sitting for SPM. I'm about to take a journey to get out of highschool. I finally can get out of the school that i used to hate so bad. Thinking back, it wasn't so bad after all. I learnt alot there, more than anyone did... Next year it'll be streaming. 2 more weeks till we are all seperated to be in a diff class once again.. to not be as close as we used to... 4 SB will definetly be the best class i've ever been throughout my SA life. The teachers are perfect, my classmates are perfect, my buddies are more than perfect. I love 4SB. I'll miss it like hell.

Form 5. 17. when i was young.. i've always wish to be at the age of 17.. now that i'm about to step into that age its like.... a dream. It all still seems that it is the starting of form 4. Without knowing New Year is 2 months away. 2007, will be 2008. All that is left will be memories.